Tag Archives: Cancer

No More Blood To Give.

17 Jan

I went down to my local town hall last night to give blood and was told that because I’ve had cancer, I’ll never be able to donate blood again. This makes me very sad. So much so that I cried in front of the nurse – what a numpty!

On a serious note though, I really am gutted. The nurse said it’s because they don’t yet know how cancer spreads through the body (which is probably why I can’t have a massage for the next 5 years either), so until further research is done on this I can’t donate any more blood.

I have tried to donate blood regularly since I was eligible to do so when I turned 18, and knowing that it’s unlikely that I’ll ever be able to donate again (or get a free Tuc biscuit) is just shit.

Tuc biscuits were my favourite post blood donation snack

Tuc biscuits were my favourite post blood donation snack

Having got the all clear 4 months ago, I was indescribably relieved and ecstatic. So to find that there are still going to be limitations and implications on what I can do due to the fact that I had cancer in the past is hard to accept but something that I’m going to have to learn to deal with in the coming months and years. Just another wee hurdle to jump over.

I’ll just need to ramp up my 10k runs to marathons (choke) and raise more sponsor money instead of giving blood…

If anyone wants to find out more information on giving blood visit the Scottish National Blood Transfusion Service website. The fact that only 5% of the Scottish population give blood, you really are  making a HUGE difference to someone’s life.

82 days of Cancer

1 Oct

I found out a few weeks ago, 25 days to be exact, that I got the ALL CLEAR from cervical cancer. I’m absolutely over the moon! I spent the first hour immediately after I found out in tears. I feel unbelievably lucky and relieved and delighted. All that’s left to remind me is a few tiny scars from my keyhole surgery.

It’s been 82 days from the day I was diagnosed to the day I got the all clear, not that long really. I feel so fortunate only to have skirted round the edges of cancer and not had to endure the devastation of some of the more severe treatments. I’m delighted that I can still have children and that the decision has not been taken away from me, I’ll never be able to thank the doctors enough.

I keep waiting for my new outlook on life to hit me, but it hasn’t, I’ve just carried on as before.

I think that’s why I feel a bit like a fraud. Because I haven’t had to go through the likes of chemotherapy or radiotherapy, I feel like I don’t deserve to be labelled a ‘survivor’ or that I ‘won the fight’, because in all honesty, I didn’t have to put up much of a fight. Sure it messed with my emotions BIG time, but all I did was try to think positive, as best I could, and hope for the best. And it worked.

If anything, thinking positively about my experience, is knowing that my diagnosis made a few women close to me go for a smear test they’ve been putting off. And if it stops one of them having to go on the cancer rollercoaster, then that’s good enough for  me.

With that being said, I’m still completely over the moon that I’m by with the whole mess. It’s an experience I never want to have to go through again. All the worrying and not knowing was mentally exhausting. But the sad fact is, if it’s not me, it’ll be someone very close to me who has to go through it and when that day comes I’ll be right beside them all the way just as everyone was there for me. There’s nothing else for it.

A big stooshie!

1 Aug

I have been back in Scotland just over a month now and all I seem to be doing is waiting… waiting to see this specialist, waiting for this scan, waiting to see that consultant, which makes me feel like I’m still in limbo. But on a much better note, I’ve had some great news since I came home.

I saw the specialist at Crosshouse Hospital the week after I returned home, and having brought my biopsy samples home with me from Korea for the pathologist to re-test in Scotland (yes I brought my cancer home in my hand luggage) the doctor told me that the cancer is still at a very early stage 1B. He said the tumour was tiny and that it’s completely curable – the only downside is maybe the price I’ll have to pay i.e. my fertility. He also said that it’s unlikely that I’ll need any chemotherapy or radiotherapy. As you can imagine I was delighted to hear this news! In fact delighted doesn’t even begin to cover it, it was the best news I’d had since this whole malarky started!

Having had this news I feel like my life is no longer on hold and I can start to plan things again and look for a job.  Since that appointment I’ve had an MRI scan (the doctor was happy that the cancer hasn’t spread) and I’ve been referred to a specialist at Stobhill hospital in Glasgow. After a consultation with him, I’ll have another cone biopsy, similar to what I had in Korea (to make sure they have removed all the cancer) and I think they also plan to take out a few lymph nodes to test to check that the cancer hasn’t spread to them. And as far as I’m aware that might be all the treatment I’ll need. If that is the case then I feel like I’ve caused a big stooshie over nothing!

Nonetheless, until I’ve had the all-clear the war paint stays firm!

Mel Gibson as William Wallace in Braveheart